Some of my closest friends make fun of me:āYoutuber at 50āāThis summer Iām going to be your party saboteur because on Fridays I have the imposter syndromeāThey think itās hilarious that Iām launching a Youtube channel at 45 (not 50 by the way), and they make fun of the fluffy conversations that we sometimes have here on LinkedIn. The motivational tone that we use to inspire others, the coaching concepts like āthe impostor syndromeā, āyour inner criticā, etcā¦They say that this is a platform of coaches talking to each other.And I LOVE it. It grounds me and make me even more real. I admit sometimes I get a little bit angry with these ignorant people but I can't wait to see them again and self-sabotage together with a drink!How do your good friends keep you grounded?
https://youtu.be/AYER7capsqQOne of my clients was very clear about what he had to do to reach his important and long-term goals.But the truth is that he was too busy solving immediate and urgent tasks.He was very productive in those areas where he performed well, but that place where he felt confident at some point became his limitation.Our brain is wired to keep us safe and avoid danger for our own survival; so how do we convince ourselves to go to that difficult place where good things happen?I suggested a ĀØMoving beyond comfort zonesĀØ exercise based on the book ĀØ101 Coaching Strategies and TechniquesĀØ by Gladeana Mc Mahon consisting of three steps:Step 1ļøā£:Identify three of your comfort zones. Those areas where youĀ“d benefit if you made a change.Step 2ļøā£:Choose the one that will get you closer to your important goals, and that you are ready to challenge. Take a piece of paper and break it down:ā What benefits would that bring you?ā What are your fears?ā WhatĀ“s holding you back?Step 3ļøā£:Face those fears and expand your comfort zone.ā List the actions you could do to expand your limitationsā Detail the support you need and from whomā Prioritize each action and specify the dates when you will startOur comfort zone is a great place, but nothing great grows there anymore.LetĀ“s be brave and tell our brain thereĀ“s nothing to fear. š
You canĀ“t give what you donĀ“t have. āØIf you want to give affection and support to those around you, you need to be well yourself. Forcing yourself to care for others when you are not in a good state is not sustainable.ItĀ“s like asking your bank for a loan to give money to others when you donĀ“t have a penny yourself. In the end the system will collapse.The desire to support others with their well-being arises spontaneously when we experience positive emotions ourselves.Taking care of yourself is a generous act of kindness. š¹Invest in yourself, my friend!
Only when you experience something do you fully understand it. āØIĀ“ve tried to understand and master mindfulness several times during the last two years. IĀ“ve started two courses and learned the theory, but I never finished them.IĀ“m very aware of how much the practice can help me, but it didnĀ“t click and I felt maybe IĀ“m just not spiritual enough.Then last week an amazing Mindfulness teacher at the Positive Psychology Masters IĀ“m studying explained that the best place to practice is within your own life.Because mindfulness only means that:ā We pay attention to a specific thing (breathing, body...)ā With an intentionā With an attitude of kindness, without judging the experience.If you know the theory you can practice mindfulness anywhere: while walking your dog, cooking . . . or just having a conversation š, and youĀ“ll get the same benefits. You donĀ“t need to wear yoga pants and burn incense in a quiet room. You can train your brain to be fully present anywhere!And thatĀ“s what IĀ“ve been intensely doing these past two years.In each coaching session:ā I pay full attention to a specific thing: my clientsĀ“ storiesā With a clear intention: to structure the conversation and create the space to thinkā With an attitude of kindness without judging the experience: always!So my Masters includes a third meditation course, but this time IĀ“m going to nail it. It took me two years of unintentional practice but I finally got it.In which activities are you fully present? Where are you in your meditation journey?(Thank you Cristian Coco, Mindfulness teacher at MAPPA UJI).